Crazy

Infinity and Beyond?

The concept of infinity, inarguably and understandably, is irresistable to the human animal. Given his brief conscious lifetime, the promise of eternity--in any conceivable guise--is the proverbial life raft adrift in a tractless ocean.

Given that we do not know what follows the "death" of our consciousness, and given that we have no recollection (Shirley McClain, pick up the white courtesy phone) of what, if anything, came before our earliest childhood memory, the idea of simply ceasing to be is not one we can intellectualize.

As a species we are famously unwilling to be patient and wait, or seek to learn for ourselves, Answers to the Big Questions. And high on that list is the question of "what happens to me after I die?" Instead, for a myriad of reasons, we have resolutely set about filling in the blanks: reincarnation, religion ... the list is well known.

For many, filling in the blanks in such ways IS the proverbial life raft. I have always found that personally unsatisfying. To me, half the fun in life has come in declining the safe harbor and, instead, swimming with the currents ... attuned to my physical senses, listening to thoughts competing for place in my mind, keenly aware that there is uncertainty--even death--all around me.

I have no death wish, but nothing makes me feel more alive than remembering, every single day, that THIS moment, here and now, is the only thing I can and likely will ever truly Know. The future is a blank slate. And memory, while precious, is at best an impressionist painting morphing over time.

Will I experience "something else" after death? Maybe, maybe not. Kinda doubt it, but as a confirmed agnostic I'm open to any possibility. Meanwhile, give me an good strong current to ride over safe harbor any day of the week.

Twice on Sunday.

The Question of God

The way I am able to perceive it through the lens of my human faculties, the universe, boiled down to its core, is either

1) the "creation" of some Force/Entity, or

2) a naturally occurring, random and scientifically knowable process.

Let us stipulate for purposes of this discussion that the universe we perceive today was "created" by some Entity. Where do we go from there? What more can we do in terms of defining the parameters of said Entity?

More importantly, why do we feel we must go farther?

Why have we (humanity--the big "we") felt compelled to fill in the cosmic blanks and proceed with such fervor from the reasonable and sensible act of intellectualizing one possible explanation for the physical universe, to Seven Days of Creation, poison apples, burning bushes, immaculate conceptions, ascension to heaven on a white horse to ... ? All of this, I note, on one humble planet orbiting one of 100 billion suns in one of the 125 billion galaxies we have perceived to date.

For many years, I have sought from non-dogmatic religious men and women a meaningful explanation for and reconciliation of the leap humankind has made from intellectualizing the possibility that his universe has been willfully created, to the myriad competing, interpretative structures and artifices our species has built around the concept. The Creator Entity we logically and emotionally accept as a possibility has, in the eyes and hearts of millions throughout our species' history, been transformed from some inconceivably capable, remote intellectual concept, to the subject of institutionalized debating societies intent on convincing each successive generation that their particular Creator model, right down to his Motivations and his Will, represents Truth.

The leap is, simply, staggering. To the Agnostic mind, it is inconsistent not just with logic but common sense. It bespeaks not a quest for knowledge but a psychic night light against our vestigial fear of the dark. And that we have made the leap with at best wildly subjective circumstantial "evidence" alone, and even in this scientific age continue to turn daily to solemn intellectual exercises in strained logic in an effort to try to "prove" any of it ... is enough to drive me before you today to ask, yet again, as I will for as long as I live, of anyone listening and willing to venture into these waters ... why?

Is it not enough to marvel at the magnificence of the universe, and seek its answers through humble, patient and testable investigation, without inventing its cause, history and meaning to suit our needs?

No offense intended to any fellow human being or deity Who might be listening.

Religion or Village?

Responding to the argument that religion’s primary function is teaching Right from Wrong:

The role of providing moral and behavioral guidance to each individual should properly--and pragmatically--fall upon parents. Parents and the village in which each child is raised (no invoking Hillary, please; "village" is not a dirty word). One hopes there were far more compelling reasons behind creating entire universal belief systems based on nebulous "retribution or reward after death" constructs than getting children to eat their vegetables and remembering that they probably shouldn’t kill the neighbors.

My own children are being raised Agnostic. They have been exposed to religion and taught to respect other’s beliefs, and are being taught to think outside the box as well. We talk about life and death, right and wrong and soul and conscience every day, within the context of what life brings before us each and every day and in context of the lessons of history.

They are headed towards adulthood armed with minds open to all possibilities …

1) that there is a phenomenon in our universe which we might all recognize as worthy of the connotations we place on the word "God,"

2) that our existence--our perception of it, anyway--is purely the product of natural processes that are likely to have been repeated or approached countless times and in countless locations throughout the universe,

3) that there are aspects of said universe so far beyond our current capacity to know or comprehend that to speculate, while intellectually stimulating and healthy, at the end of the day is still just that--speculation,

4) that we, as individuals and as a species, may never “know” Answers to the age-old questions about who we are, why we are here and where we might be going.

And despite all the apparent confusion, my children still generally eat their vegetables (not always happily, mind you, but understanding the "why") and I'm fairly confident our neighbors are not in danger, at least from them, in the dead of night.

It did not take scripted religion to achieve this. It took caring.

I do not presume to criticize any living creature's right to find their own way, pursue their own truth or to seek their own comfort. I have simply found mine in absolving myself of the need to Know, in the here and now, How It All Works. And in endeavoring every day to live my life in a manner I could defend with firm voice and a clear conscience before any court ... be it a court of Man, or the court of any entity worthy of all the connotations we place behind the word God.

Agnostic Through the Years

In my youth, I was an Apologetic Agnostic: "Sorry, I just don't know."

In my teens, I was a Sullen Agnostic: "Dunno. Don't care."

In my twenties, I was a Militant Agnostic: "I. Don't. Know. And you don't either."

In my thirties, I was a Practical Agnostic: "I don't know, sweetie. Daddy's still learning too."

In my forties, I'm a Wary Agnostic: "I'm thinking we should probably define ‘God’ before trying to have a meaningful discussion about this. How long you got?"

In my fifties, I'll be ... well, I don't know. But I have to admit, as the first hints of future curmudgeonry whisper at the edges of my mind, I find myself thinking the new paradigm will probably wear camouflage again.

I'll try to keep him in line.

Evidence of God

I was once asked ...

“In what way would a God need to reveal Godself to you in order for you to believe that a God exists? Secondly ... if you were God, how would you reveal yourself to the people of the world?"

Simply, in such a way as to leave no reasonable human any doubt. The truth is that some of us, considering ourselves at least semi-sentient, have what I respectfully submit is pretty reasonable doubt.

But, to answer the question ... what would it take specifically? I venture the following with a pronounced twinkle in my eye, in hopes not offending, making the point and even, with luck, perhaps amusing.

To wit:

If we're at the Redskins game next Sunday, and the sky suddenly lights up around 11 o'clock ... and some fellow who looks like Chuck Heston with a face a dozen times the size of the Moon appears ... or some form of entity never before seen around these parts manifests Itself ... and each of the 90,000 fellow humans around us in the stadium perceive It as we do ... and we all perceive It as It begins communicating how It feels about us, or sharing insight on how The Whole Thing Works or some other Really Big Thing ... and then perhaps rearranges a constellation or two while we all watch agog (you know, just to show us It’s serious) ... and when we all wake up the next morning the whole thing is in all the papers and on the news and by golly there's the film and sound and everything ... and all the subsequent frenzied digging by all the world's best scientists and all the world's best investigative media reveal that no, we were not in fact all going through some mass psychosis, or suffering a drug-induced mass hallucination due to a bad strain of grain and that yes, in fact this thing really did happen ... and oh by the way, the Big Dipper now looked like a Smiley Face instead of a spoon ... then yeah.

That would pretty much do it, I think.

A really smart guy once said that extraordinary claims require extraordinary evidence. All flippancy aside, that's what it would take. Extraordinary evidence. Nothing more, nothing less. Well, maybe a little less, but I think you get my drift.

When and if it happens, there won't be any question.

Until then ... question I will.

Mission Statement

I am an Agnostic--skeptical, yet open-minded.

I am prepared and willing to accept that which my senses process without preconception, discrimination or prejudice.

Perpaps the Universe is but a magnificent, happy accident--a logical and orderly interplay of Natural forces, however unimaginable to the nascent Minds spawned from her primordial soups.

Perpaps the Universe teems with life, intelligence and civilization, spread through the inconceivable vastness of space and covering the full spectrum of the evolutionary scale, all seeking, as do I, meaning, understanding and a sense of place.

Perhaps the Universe is the willful creation of an unimaginable Intelligence, with unknowable motivation, who built this vast playground for the benefit--or responsibility--of the tender lives placed within.

Perhaps, incredibly, said creator crafted this Universe wholly and exclusively for Man--for this one in a million million species to have swum, crawled, slithered, walked, flown or simply exist on this one tenuous little blob of whilring mud, circling an unstable Roman Candle in a remote corner of an average galaxy of 100 billion suns, in a Universe of 125 billion galaxies, in its four billion year history.

Perhaps said Intelligence is even an active Overseer of all things, from physical to metaphysical and beyond, Who, even as I write, guides my thoughts, heart and hands. Seems unlikely, that last part ... but I have to admit, as a true Agnostic with an open yet skeptical mind, that it's a possiblity. I just don't know.

But I do have some thoughts.